New Year Ahead

My house is empty as Susanna is gone for the weekend. I am not necessarily pleased about that as I like company.

Today I had a moment of reflection while emptying my bladder during the last minutes of my break. I pondered over the profession I chose to get myself into and realised the world of nursing can be a very sad place. There seem to be some sort of pride in being overworked, never getting breaks and always working overtime for no pay. And if, if you get both your tea break and your lunch break adding the fact that you actually get to leave on time, then you're considered a lazy old sod!

I renounce that.

Tomorrow is the last day of 2011, a year that has passed surprisingly quick. Sometimes you have certain expectations for a year, and when 2011 started I realised I had none. It appeared to be a haul taking me from 2010 to 2012, and that is pretty much what it has been. No major changes, life has been pretty easy-going. Saying that, time has now come to catch the exit for 2012, which will be a completely different story. Oh yeah, bring on the dirt roads!

Complany is a word for company that spend all their time complaining.


All Love

Christmas Time

And so today is the 27th of December and it's soon time to head back to England. I flew to Sweden to surprise my family for Christmas, and it has been some lovely days! My sister Rut, the only one who knew I was coming, picked me up from the airport, and as my dad opened the door he stood staring for a few seconds before he took me in his arms and gave me a big hug. I do love my family, and they were all delighted to have me back for the holiday, and I have to admit I was pretty delighted myself.

It has now been 3 days with Christmas food, walks, games and giggles, and it's time to pack my bag and prepare for the journey back. We're now heading for the new year, may it be an exciting one!

All Love

Christmas Drawing Nearer

What a day! Woke up bright and early, frost outside my window! I got dressed, had breakfast and then jumped on my bike and cycled in to a "made in Bristol" Christmas fair. Then I went across the centre to buy tickets for Coram Boy, a play/musical full of Christmas spirit. Maria + mom, Jimbo and Sus - the 22nd of December it is! I then went to Broadmead which was packed with Christmas shoppers. I bought oranges, found a group of people from my church singing carols and joined in. I may not have much of a voice, but I enjoyed it even if the shoppers didn't!

On my way back I bumped into Tim and joined him for a cup of tea in the chilled sunshine, then went hunting for fresh yeast. Fresh yeast is a rare product in Bristol, and my yeast shop had run out of it. I had to go to Tesco's bakery and put on my "you are the only one who can save my Christmas" look and ask them to give me some. I had not even finished my first sentence when the kind baker disappeared to get me some. My lucky day! Then cycled home to make vörtbröd (Christmas bread), meatballs and biscuits. I'm tired, but I have a Christmas soiree to attend shortly. My star housemate is now making me lunch/dinner and I'm trying to stay awake.

Tomorrow we're having a Christmas Lunch and then going to a Carol service in church. And on Thursday me and Maria are going to Oxford to join Maciej, my floorball-mate, for the Christmas Market.

Christmas is all around baby!

All Love

All Love

Today has been great! After 12 hours of sleep (to make up for the last few weeks) I woke up to a sunny day, and as I was washing my face the sun lit up the mirror and reflected in the water and it made me smile, the kind of smile you have when you feel truly happy. I feel like giving the whole world a hug, from the dirtiest tramp to the richest idiot. That's what knowing God does to me, and I love it!  

The most common argument I get when people find out I'm a Christian is how a good God can allow so much pain and suffering. I've never been good at meeting that question because it's usually fuelled by a deep pain, and when an argument is caused by anger it will never reason. It leaves me feeling uneasy and sad, because they got it so wrong. I say, because of bad decisions (right at the beginning of the Bible) the world we know ended up in the hands of evil. Now, God could have swiped it all out and started from scratch, like you do a bad drawing or a messed up recording. The thing is, that would have meant getting rid of us, something He wasn't prepared to do. So we ended up in the middle of a war between good and evil, like pieces on a chess board. The evil knows that the best way to get to God is to attack the ones He loves the most. Maybe it is that the evil one does not care about us at all, but he knows that God does. Now God could bring judgement day anytime, but the problem is that most people wouldn't survive it. It would be like trying to run Windows software on a Mac, or trying to microwave old tupperware. Unless we turn our hearts to God and get transformed we simply cannot make Heaven. And so there is pain and there is suffering, but there is also love. And the love I know is bigger than any suffering, even the pain that is so deep it feels like the inside is screaming and it seems like nothing in the world could ever make you happy again. It's tough, but I would rather take the pain, I'd rather go through fire than see the ones I love go under. And this is why we have Jesus, the cross and salvation. Love.

A week from today Tony starts detox again. He told me today, and it was a long time since I saw him so happy. I know the odds are against him, but I know that odds aren't always right. Fighting until the end.

All Love

Gangsta Pubing

Yesterday was Friday night and an empty house! All my friends seemed to be snuggled up in bed and I started to get a bit restless, longing for some company and change of scenery. And so I decided to do the one brave thing: Head out to the local on a Friday night! I ordered my Whiskey and Coke and sat down by the fireplace to regain some warmth from being sat in our lounge without slippers for too long. I cannot recall one bad memory from fires, there's something about them that makes me feel at peace, brings out memories and makes me dream about the future. And so I enjoyed the fire until my boots felt like melting, and I started to make a tour around the pub.

The main visitors to the pub were black/caribbean men, and so I felt slightly out of place, but on the other hand it was MY local, so I had all right to be there. In my head I was thinking I was more gangsta than any of them, but then they all seemed quite friendly, the odd strong smell of weed, especially around the Jamaicans.

After the fire I made a move toward the pool table where I caused immediate distraction. A young chap called Abz was so busy chatting me up his opponent had plenty of time to move all the balls around on the table without him noticing. I ended up playing a few games with them, and I discovered that my pool skills have surely gone embarrassingly rusty. I reckon I should try and pop into the pub more often to get some more practice.

When my sister comes next week I should take her to Lebeqs Tavern, my local!

All Love

Disco Dance Rescue Patrol

Today has been an interesting day. Had Immediate Life Support (ILS) training at work, and apparently I'm brilliant at doing chest compressions. If anyone wonders, they should be done in the same rhythm as Lady Gaga's Poker Face, so better bring the i-pod to the next resuscitation! Good fun though, trying to bring the dummie back to life, and at the end of the day I was warm and sweaty from all the Gaga compressions and my brain was slightly dysfunctional from all ABCDE assessments and post-resuss arm dances. Tired during the last defibrillation my "stand clear" turned into a "back off". Whatever works...

I spoilt myself to a bus ticket today, and on my way home the window I was sat by suddenly cracked. No-one saw what happened, if someone threw something at the bus or if there was some sort of weakness from before, but I decided to move seat before I was covered by shattered glass. Another passenger made the clever statement that someone probably doesn't like me. I wonder if it was my looks that shattered the glass, that's always a possibility. Anyway, the bus driver decided driving wasn't safe and we all had to get out and wait for another bus. I was kind of disappointed, I was looking forward to some action.

That's Bristol life for today!

All Love

Halloween

Saturday we decided to go gothic, inspired by Ben and Lindsey's history in the goth scene. Me and Maria went out and got black outfits, gloves and dog collars - adding a bit of makeup and we were ready to go! First to Bedminster to check out Ben and Lindz's new gaff, then off to The Hatchet; home of goths, punks and other mischievous creatures. We were way too happy and bouncy to fit in among the goths though, our serious moments lasted for about 3 seconds.

The reason why we don't make good goths - happiness!

Sunday evening and I'm just back from the first floorball training with our new team. Me and a few other guys decided to break out from Trowbridge and create a Bristol team as we got fed up with the attitude of some of our old team mates, and the first training looked promising. I reckon we will have quite some fun playing together!

All Love

Not a Real Girl

Today as I was out walking I was suddenly hit by a wave of nausea. I'm not sure if it was triggered by the thought of a long-term relationship or the fact that I stepped into a shopping mall. Most likely a combination. I had to sit down, get some fresh air and calm my nerves. 

I went out to buy a dress, but only managed to walk through a few shops as I felt rather sick and panicky as soon as I entered them. Also, my i-pod was out of batteries so I couldn't distract my mind from where I was. I managed, with a lot of focus and determination, to buy some underwear. After that I bought a Pepsi-Max, went out and called it for the day. In one of the shops I noticed a nice sweater, but saw no reason to buy it as I already have 5 functional ones at home. Apparently I'm not a real girl. 

On my way home later in the afternoon, believe it or not, I actually managed to buy a dress. I'm not sure it's a nice model, or if the colour's right, or if it's at all in fashion. It's lying in the hallway and I feel a slight resentment towards it, maybe because I feel I now have to wear it. 

All Love

Sickness

I woke up this morning at 07:35, light still on and the phone still in my hand. I felt rough, remembered I forgot to set the alarm and went back to sleep. 3 hours later I dragged myself out of bed, head pounding and body aching. Had some yoghurt, realised I had no appetite, took 2 Paracetamols and went back to bed. I called in sick.

I have felt better. My mind is spinning, I wish it would go to sleep.

All Love

The Little Things

Things I will miss when I move away from England.

• Asking for normal tea, everyone knowing exactly what that means (English breakfast, milk no sugar).
• My oversized Homer Simpsons slippers
• Insulting Welsh people by mistaking them for being English
• My Norwegian duck down duvet
• Pubbing on weekdays
• Rugby
• The panic caused by the tiniest little snowfall

Change

First blogging on my new computer and I love it! My old one is probably still trying to start up since I turned it on 20 minutes ago. It's been time for retirement too long now, I should let it off before it kicks the bucket. 

Today was fun, slightly frustrating and very confusing. I'm talking about the first friendly floorball game of the season. Our team consisted of 15 players with a variety in experience, skill and nationality. In the end, the few of us who have been playing in proper teams before could do nothing but shake our heads and laugh. It was terribly unorganised and the amount of people shouting change throughout the game was ridiculous. The league is starting in 2 weeks time, and boy, will that be interesting!

This video makes me happy, although the music is terrible!

All Love

Last Breath of Summer





The lagoon in Weston-Super-Mare
















Yesterday was my first visit to Weston-Super-Mare, and it was a perfect day to be spent by the seaside. It's now the last day of September, and the weather suddenly turned to summer. It's 27 degrees outside and the sky is a clear blue. Our washing is out drying in the sun and the strawberry plants are still in bloom. Suddenly it doesn't feel like autumn anymore. What gives it away though is the early sunset and the colours of the trees.
Today is the end of what turned into a 3-week holiday, starting on nights this very evening. Time has finally come to re-unite with antibiotics, wound dressings and obs charts, oh joy.

All Love

Life Sucks, Thank God I Love You

Today's been good, but then it's Wednesday, so of course it's been good. Had a sweet quiet time, listening to Blindside while reading Matthew 7:7, thinking about what I really ask for, seek and press into in life. I'm not too concerned about the future, maybe because I don't care too much. After all I live for death rather than life, and I don't mean that in a depressing kind of way. Although, truth be told, most of the time I think that life generally sucks. Maybe I've seen too much pain and suffering, knowing that behind most smiles people are broken and pretty messed up. No, life isn't easy, it's full of traps and tramps. So, I decided not to hang on to it too dearly, but rather let it hit me and take the blows bravely. Life is somewhat like a storm, and it's just a matter of when it'll finally get the best of us. God is not like a storm though, he is the sunshine breaking through the thick clouds, making life more endurable and making me want to fight a bit longer. There's a song we used to sing in church when I was a kid, With Jesus in the boat I can smile in the middle of the storm, and however silly it may sound, it's actually true. So maybe I don't love life, but I surely love the people in it - every single broken soul. And that thought makes me smile.

All Love

The English Riviera



Holiday round II took me to Torquay, at the very south of England. First I stopped in Taunton where Rachel (my former house mate) works and spent a day there before we headed south to Torquay together. Rachel lent me her bike while she was working and I went on a 20 mile bike ride around the country side, all the way up to Wellington monument and back. Uphill my tummy started rumbling and my legs started to ache, and so I had to take a break photographing bulls just to settle my stomach and regain energy. By the time I got to the monument I was starving, but managed to miss the pub's food serving hours by 10 minutes and therefore had to settle for a small bag of crisps and a pint of water for lunch. By then anything would do, and because most of the remaining journey was downhill I managed to survive. Just about. Later me and Rachel caught the train toward Torquay where we were served dinner by Gemma. Then three tired birds went to bed early, ready for a full on day Saturday.



Bullies





Saturday had a brilliant start, heading down towards the coastline for a morning swim in the sea. It was cold and refreshing, the amazing feeling of salt water in my face. I felt very very happy. Then we went for brunch at a cafe overlooking the harbour, watching the end of the rugby game, which Ireland gracefully won, sipping tea and enjoying a warming full fry. After that we went back to Gem's den and caught a ride with Red Emma to Plymouth to watch Amerca's cup, a catamaran race. We were probably the only ones cheering loudly, but how could we not, over excited as we were, cheering the Swedish team through both loss and victory. After Plymouth we went back to Torquay, met up with a girl Gemma and Rachel met in South America and went out for Italian and dancing.

 

Warmed up by Gem after swimming


 

America's Cup in Plymouth


 

Woop Woop, go Sweden!!


Sunday was a day of snoozing and recovering. We managed to get ourselves out for a walk along a beach somewhere near Brixham, enjoying more beautiful scenery and fresh air. Then back for some Tacos and drinking hot chocolate watching film in bed.

 

Gem, me and Rachel


  

Skimming Action



Monday morning I packed my bag and went down for a last view of the sea before I caught the train back to Bristol. I can still remember the sound of the waves rolling in and I do miss it. I owe BIG thanks to Rachel and Gemma for an amazing weekend with brilliant company, and another thank you to Tim for lending me his shoulder for the snooze on the train back.

Boots off for wading in water

Waiting for train

Thursday (which is not tomorrow I was so kindly reminded by my polite driver) my next journey begins - I'll be heading down to Holland accompanied by two lovely strangers to go boating in Rotterdam.

All Love

London Calling

Just got back from London, my first stop during my three weeks of holiday. On my way there I got a call from Linda, my childhood friend, commenting on the hotel I booked. She's obviously not used to the British standard cause when I arrived I couldn't see the problem. The sheets were clean and the shower was working. The squeaking bed and naked lamp bulb were minor details. It's not like we were gonna do nothing but sleeping in the bed anyway...

Victoria Station, waiting for Linda who got lost in the tubes

Our first evening was spent in 'Round Midnight, a brilliant blues bar, listening to live blues and sipping red wine. It was an amazing night and I felt very happy, and I'm sure Linda felt the same despite yawning and putting her hands over her ears. Earlier that evening I made the discovery that splashing spicy oriental soup in the eye can be quite painful, and it's not recommended.

Our second day we went to The Natural history Museum, where Linda lost her rail ticket and I lost my energy. We got inside information from Matt who can't dance about where to find good RnB in London, and so went out for some clubbing. When we at last managed to find the place they asked me for ID before I even got to the queue, saying I didn't look older than 20. He did reassure me though, telling me I definitely looked older than 18. Oh well. Getting inside we had to walk through a metal detector, and they went through our bags thoroughly. They never have this procedure in Bristol, and I realised I left my swiss army knife in the bag, which of course they found and decided to keep. Inside at last I decided to put my bag on the floor, but before I knew it I was surrounded by three security men who told me to hand it in or wear it. I promise, I couldn't fart in there without them telling me off, security was everywhere. If I stood in front of the ventilation for 2 seconds I was told off, if I held my glass on the wrong side of the rail I was told off, they even told me off for possibly thinking about going where I shoudn't go. But apart from over engaged security, the music was brilliant and the people happy - and so we danced! Getting home we were ripped off by a young Australian guy who cycled us all the way to our hotel. Expensive but quite entertaining.

Linda, waiting for goat cheese

Third day, Saturday, and we decided to do less walking. We went through the shopping area and then strolled over to Green Park to lie down in the sun and eat ice cream. By the time we got out of the tube it started raining. So we bought ice cream and layed down under some trees, which actually wasn't too bad. Later that evening we went to see Wicked, one of the big musicals in London, and we really enjoyed it. Early night as Linda had to take a taxi at 03:30 in the morning. We said goodbye and I went back to sleep.

Swedes in Green Park

Sunday morning I went to Hillsong for the morning service, and it was really good. There's a reason I cannot wear eye makeup to church these days. Went straight from church to the coach station to catch my bus back to Bristol. On my way back I couldn't forget some of the people we met in London, there's just so much poverty and loneliness in the big city, it's quite heartbreaking.

Now I'm off to see Troll Hunter with Jim, cause that's just my kind of film... eh.

All Love

Chilled Wednesday

I got the day off work today as I kindly agreed to stay overtime yesterday. I slept until I woke up, started the day doing some washing, sipping Southern Comfort and playing guitar waiting for the machine to finish. As the machine took ages I decided to watch Trainspotting in bed and then went down to meet up with Tony. All in all it's been a really layed back day, and I quite enjoyed it. I decided this had to be a quiet week (cause last week surely wasn't), declined the open mic night at the pub and I'm now back home, tea awaiting. Looking forward to holiday starting next week.

All Love

Crayfish Party

It is Monday morning, and I should really start getting ready for work. We have had an amazing weekend, and are just so grateful for all our wonderful friends. Saturday morning we started preparing for the crafish party, making cheese quiches, smörgåstårta (sandwich-cake), chocolate balls and defrosting the crayfish. Then I went into town to buy shot glasses and veggies, grabbing the opportunity to check out the block party on Nelson street where graffiti artists from around the world had been working on the previously dull buildings.

At 7pm the party started, the crayfish ever so juicy and the drinking songs (helan går) ever so loud. There were lanterns, hats, napkins and snaps. We had such a lovely time, and I think both me and Maria wanted to wrap up all our friends in a ginormous hug! As we were heading towards midnight we took the party into town and went swinging our legs on the dancefloors. We got back in around 4.30 in the morning, and I didn't get out of bed until 13:40pm on Sunday. Then I joined the rest of the crew out in the sunny garden, was served a full English breakfast and relaxed before the cleaning began...

(My room on first floor facing garden)

Jim and Maria the morning after

All Love

August Update

It's busy times. Most of the furniture is now in place and it's a matter of getting the last bits unpacked. It's taken us a long time, and we're happy to finally see some progress. The weekend coming up we are hosting a crayfish party at our house. Thanks to IKEA we're able to celebrate this amazing Swedish tradition with both crayfish and snaps! Ojojoj. I don't know how many of you have heard about the riots in London, but we have had some here in Bristol as well. Easton suddenly appears as a very quiet neighbourhood, I guess there aren't that many shops worth to rob around here. Saying that, I'm happy not to be kept awake by helicopters at night.

All Love

Sweden --> England

Returning to England, I was greeted by some proper British rain, just as I remembered it when I left. Rain wasn't the only thing to greet me, as things had been growing at home since I left the house. Mainly in the kitchen and in the garden. Being on holiday back home (sweden-home) is busy, trying to find time to catch up with everybody, but then, I'm not sure it's that much busier than my average week in Bristol.

So what happened in Sweden? I'll try keep it short. I met up with some good old friends and family, drank tea, beer  and ate good food. Seafood was on the top, and home made Swedish meat balls were a big hit as well! I loved the sea and the lakes, and a lot of days were spent by the water. There was also time for beach volley, bbq's, baby-sitting and dog-sitting. I visited some lovely people in Örebro, and went to my cousin's wedding in Stockholm. Me and my dad took our Hobie Wahoo out for a two-day sailing trip and ended up almost drowning ourselves in the waves on our way home. Gale and Hobies aren't a good combination! I will miss our beautiful house and big garden, the sea, the forests and the lakes with their jetties. Speaking of which, the grande finale was an hour of skinny dipping with my lovely sisters from one of 'em jetties! I will miss home, no doubt!

Shrimps and crayfish night

From a jetty on a lake anywhere in Sweden

Saying that, I am not really one to keep looking back, I know England has its own charms. Summer isn't over yet, and with some luck, there will be sunshine in Bristol again! As I phoned Tony yesterday, I could hear the joy in his voice as he realised I was back. He feared I'd decided to stay in Sweden and he didn't know how to contact me. Bless him, I'll meet up with him tomorrow! One day back, and the week is fully booked. Oh yeah, hit me life!

All Love

Sticky Love

Me and my sister are on the bus home from our cousin's wedding. It's interesting how a wedding, where pretty much all you do is eating, singing and listening to speaches, can wear you out. I feel exhausted, but then I've had 3,5 hours of sleep the last couple of nights...

Weddings are pretty sweet. Not only because there's so much good food, but because someone you know well has been completely swept away by insane love for another person. And they are more than happy about it, and so is everyone else. And you know that things will not be the same any more, cause once again, love has turned things around...

Love, the power to change a person completely, to restore or to ruin. Now, there are different kinds of love, but let's stick to the romantic sticky one for once. I think everyone who's ever fallen in love can agree with me that it is like entering a different world. Laws of time does not apply anymore. One day is like a year, and a year is like a day. Being apart makes every minute seem like torture and being together is trying to hang on to every moment like life depended on it. It's not logical and not reasonable. You can never win an argument with a person in love because they do not listen to any other voice than the desire of their heart. Like metal to a magnet they seem inseparable, constantly attracted to each other. No matter when or where, a person in love will always carry the other person in the back or front of their mind all day and all night. It is crazy, completely madness, but once you've fallen - you're lost to this new world and there will be no escaping.

Sticky love is for good and bad. I guess when it all works out, like for my cousin, it is one of the sweetest things one can experience. But when things does not work out... you're in for a tough round.

Last day in Sweden now. An update about my holiday is to come shortly (I hope).

All Love

HOLIDAY

Last day at work tomorrow, then it's holiday time! I've packed my wetsuit, a dress, high heels (!), bikini, some tops and some underwear. Toothbrush, camera, lap top and sunglasses to be added. I'm going back to Sweden baby, for 2 weeks! I'm looking forward to sailing, bbq's, skinny-dipping, beach volley, and quality sister time. Sometimes I do miss home. I was thinking about something English to bring that Sweden is lacking, but could think of nothing... ouch.

So I've been packing and I've made a Swedish style mud cake for tomorrow's party. Left to do is cleaning and a hot bath. Did I mention it's my last working day tomorrow?  Excitement!

Time to take Wahoo out for the first breath of sea this season!

All Love

Playful Minds and Childlike Excitement

One thing me and my housemate Sus have in common is that we're both very playful. The other day we were both extremely bored about all the things we had to do, and decided to leave it and go out and play instead. We ran upstairs, got changed and picked up the frisbee, then ran barefeet out from the house to the park and played for over an hour. We jumped around, made headstands, fell over and made the frisbee fly like magic. It was amazing! Then we went inside, did the dutiful washing up and hanging up laundry and then sat down , drank chai latte and played guitar til the clock had passed bedtime. Maria, if you're joining our household you know what you're in for!

Today I went and picked up my inlines - real Rollerblades! And all my protective wear had arrived as well. I'm so excited, the only thing missing must be a Walkman! When I arrived home the period pains started to make themselves known. It is not fair! Men can walk to the shop these days in order to get food, but women still have to give birth (or bleed)! God surely must have known this when he did the cursing?! Anyway, called in sick and ended up in bed. Tomorrow I will be back to normal!

Going Green

The unpacking is going slowly as we're waiting for some furniture still. We are settling in though, and the house has not given us any too bad surprises. It might be a sign of me getting older, but I have a new born desire to dig my fingers into the soil, I'm getting into gardening! Yesterday I went online shopping for plants and seeds, and maybe with a bit of luck our back garden will get a bit of blossom this summer. Today I took the bus to Eastgate to buy a spade and a watering can, and boy was that a mistake! Bank holidays and the traffic was horrendous! It took ages to get there and the bus back was 40 minutes late as all the cars coming out from the shopping centres were blocking the way. Roundabouts aren't always a good idea. I felt like running out into the street and kick the cars, and my mind said "You've got boots, you can do it". I didn't. I put on an annoyed face and clenched my fists discretely. Respect.

A bit of enamel fell off my front tooth last week, and so I have to visit the dentist on Wednesday. I tend to keep 4-5 years between visits, so I reckon it's time to bring out the floss again...

All Love

New Address

I can confirm, we have now moved houses. Me and Susanna moved from the posh neighbourhood of Redland/Clifton to the colourful neighbourhood of Easton, where the sound of police cars are frequently heard and where the local shops are full of random foods from all corners of the world. Hamdi might be pleased to know this part of town is full of Somalis. We share a house with two bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs and a kitchen, conservatory, dining room and lounge downstairs. And we have a small garden! The house is light and fresh though old and slopy. We've had a few guests walking into walls as the house reminds us a bit of "lustiga huset", walls and floor leaning in all kinds of direction. I find it charming, and call it character. I will try and get some photos up as we get properly installed and get all the boxes unpacked.

New Address:

Frida Linden
29 Beaumont Street
Bristol
BS5 0TD
United Kingdom

I have a spider in my room, I call him Nicholas and he lives in a corner of the ceiling, just over my bed. As long as he stays in his own territory he's free to lodge.

All Love

Sunshine of my Life!

It has been a gorgeous week of plenty of sun. Paris was absolutely lovely. Me and my darling mom would dress up in stripes and berets and pose in front of famous monuments, sit down at cafes for some wine and cheese and fall asleep in sunny green areas. The guy who worked in the reception of our hotel dressed up in stripes to match us. Brilliant!

Back in Bristol the sun has been shining as well. Yesterday I went fishing with Tony and his lovely 8 year old daughter Maggie. We had a lot of fun, caught nothing, but enjoyed the weather and the bacon sandwhiches. Maggie had made me Easter cards and I was given a yummy chocolate easter egg. Those two are as cheeky as can be, but they give me so much joy. I cannot remember the last time I've felt so appreciated. I plan to meet up with them at Funderworld tonight, a thing they set up on The Downs in early spring, portable rollercosters and other things that escaped the health and safety regulations.

I saw a house in Easton that I really really like. It looks light and spacious and has a rear garden. Tuesday morning I will be on the phone to see if it's still there!

Three Random Questions

Questions on my mind...

What happens to dirt?
Clearly, things such as leaves, grass and lifeless human bodies decomposes and turns into dirt after a while. But what happens to dirt? At some point the dirt surely must turn into bodies and plants, but how does that happen?

Is the shadow of Earth the same size as the moon?
When you look at the moon, the part of the Earth getting in the way of the light from the sun appears to be a circle the same size as the moon. Is that because the shadow of our planet is the same size as the moon, or does it have any other explanation?

Why does hair fall off?
They say we lose 50-100 hairs daily. Why is it that if you'd pull out a hair it would hurt, but some just fall out by themselves?

(The last question I actually googled the answer. The answer is that hairs follow the Hair Growth Cycle.)


These are things I can think about.

All Love

Things I Do When I'm Bored

I have a tan that looks fake! It looks like I need a lesson in how to apply fake tan, though it's not fake. The result of sun and snow. Lovely!

Today I was bored. When I am bored I do stupid things, like getting on dating sites. I find it very amusing until I realise people are actually serious. Then I get scared and decide never to get on a dating site again. Another annoying thing about it is that the pictures I try to upload are always declined for reasons I never understand. I guess the pictures that describe me the best are seen as either obscene or just plain scary. I find that amusing as well.

Yesterday Tony went in for detox! Go Tony, I'll cheer you through all the way mate. You will get your ass back, and then we'll go fishing!

Podcasts rock!

Susanna lent me a book called Just Do Something. Is she trying to tell me something?


All Love

You're in The Army Now

Yesterday it was confirmed. I have been adopted by the Bristish army.

A lot of people are not aware of the fact that I am currently in France for a week of snowboarding. I bought my tickets about 37 hours before I took off, a busy time full of work and last minute shopping - but I made it! I got the bus to London and from there I took the snow express (a bus) down to Les Arcs in France. The ticket man smiled when he found out my destination and said it would be an interesting journey as I would head the same direction as a big group of guys from the army. As I walked up the stairs to the bus I found 27 suddenly smiling faces staring at me. I sneaked into the one empty seat and just hoped for the best. Thankfully, a sound guy not belonging to the loud and drunk army group took the seat next to me and I made him promise not to leave my side. Let's just say the journey started off very noisy, went crazy and then ended in quietness as the hangovers started to kick in. I managed to sleep on and off.

I soon realised I was gonna stay at the same place as the hungover guys and somehow a bonding started. That is how I randomly ended up in a room for a military briefing. None of the boys minded, nor did the boss. I've been told that it's because I'm blonde and pretty. Mainly because I'm blonde. I'm not sure that is a compliment. Anyway, I've had some amazing days of snowboarding, snow and sun. I'm falling so much I'm basically eating snow, but I don't really mind. It seems to be a weird but great holiday. And I've basically been adopted by a drinking, crazy, and obscene army. They say they're taking me back with them, but I'll be heading back the way I came, back to good ole Bristol. Just not yet. Got 3 more days here  :)

Au Revoir and

All Love

Man Hunting Business

Wanted:

Man, not too old and not too young.
You do not care too much about the condition of your hair, or the condition of mine. I don't mind you singing in the shower, the louder the better if it's done with a cheerful heart. I don't mind you flashing me when you're in the mood, as long as I'm free to do the same. You do not have to know how to cook, but you need to make the effort and try. I hate hoovering, just so you know.

I love surprises. You should love surprises too. You must like travelling and adventures and not fear danger. And if you do, you must be prepared to challange your fears. You must fear God. You must be captivated by God so that you love people enough to put your life at risk, or mine. You must be passionate about what you do, yet remain humble. You must always be prepared to step outside your comfort zone.

You should like getting your hands dirty and not mind working hard. You like the quiet yet you enjoy a good party. You dance, if you're good at it matters less. No smoker. You love fires. You like exploring. You're a good kisser and a passionate lover. My hand should fit in yours.

Oh, and I must find you extremely attractive.


See, I am not hopeless!

All Love

Birthday Ramble

The 19th of February 1985 the baby girl Frida was born. 26 years later she was working in a hospital in Bristol. My birthday was celebrated with a 12 hour shift at work. One of my patients, a 92 year old man, sincerely apologised for not bringing me a present. I found that really sweet, cause he'd never seen me before I brought him back from recovery.

After work I met up with some friends for dinner and wine at our first home in England - the Beefeater in Emersons Green. Me and Julia went into town and met up with my lovely house mates Rachel and Susanna. We went to Start the Bus and danced the night away. It was a fun night and the dance challanges were mad! Legs were swinging, buttocks were flashed, guys went flying in the air, the moves were as obscene as they were silly. In the end, we walked out victoriously. The leader of the other team looked me in the eye and said that next time, it would be to the death. Then he invited me to join his crew. It was a good night. They went off to Mr Wolfs, the place that is always open, and we headed for home.

Sunday morning I was awakened by my house mates bringing me chai latte in bed. Then I got served an amazing breakfast with plentiful of fresh fruit and berries. We ended up chilling in the house all day, made a fire, ate pizza, had birthday cake and watched a film. It was a good weekend.

All Love

Stealing a Dog

Last night I was walking home along Gloucester road, and I walked past a man asleep on the pavement with his dog cheerfully strolling up the road. I grabbed the lead and brought the dog back to the man, who was very difficult to wake up. The best response I got was a lame thumbs up and that was it. I pet the happy dog a bit and tried to find ways to attach it to the man, which was easier said than done as the dog constantly tried to snatch the lead out of my hand. Eventually I gave up and walked off. I had just started walking when the dog ran past me and continued the stroll it had begun. I stopped and the dog stopped and came back to me. I tried to make it go back to it's owner, but no. Great, I thought. I'm stealing a dog. As I continuead to walk I thought the dog would realise the pack leader was missing, but eventually I gave up and picked up the lead and stopped outside the pub I had planned to enter. I asked the bouncers what I was supposed to do with this dog that wasn't mine. They at once stated that it was Alan's dog. I confirmed Alan's appearance and told them that he was sleeping on the pavement further down the road and that his dog had been following me from there. They said that Alan is basically deaf and dumb and mainly do lip reading. They told me to just tie the dog to him. Yeah, as I had not tried. Anyway, I walk the cheerful dog back to Alan, and by this time someone was just getting Alan up from the pavement. And so Alan and his happy dog were reunited and Alan was very greatful for having the dog back.

As we walked up the road, having a conversation that I barely understood, we walked past the bouncers I talked to earlier. I told Alan this was my stop and we hugged goodbye. The bouncers told me I just made a friend for life. I laughed. They were serious.

It is Sunday and I am late for church as usual.

All Love

The Unfairness of Life

Mass-destruction of my mind.

I hate when people I care about are un-happy. Especially when there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. Especially when fate seems unfair and I got the better lot. It is not my fault, it is no-ones fault, it is just the way of life. But I feel like I got blessings I never deserved, while others got so little when they deserve so much more. What is destiny to those with little hope? And so I was left feeling unsettled and low in spirit. I think I need some quality time with The Big G to get back on my feet.

Today was travel planning in front of the fire. Excitement, mixed with a slight concern. I am used to travelling alone, which means I have been able to take routes others might have avoided, and risk-taking has been left to my own measures. This time I will have to compromise. A good lesson to learn I suppose.

Now it's time for The Big G and me to have a talk...


All Love

A Mature Woman?

Today I stood by the mirror, and I discovered new depths of my skin. I looked at my wrinkles and I thought with joy "I am turning into a mature woman". And I am, if slowly, getting older. I love looking back at life to see how far I've travelled so far, especially knowing there is so much more to come! Imagine being 40!!

Yesterday we had the fire going for the first time, we sat down and played guitar and sang and were silly til the clock striked midnight. It was a good Sunday! We need to buy marshmallows...

Time to head out shoe-shopping, the holes are getting bigger!


All Love

Heart Manual

"Where is the manual to my heart?
I would like to change the settings"

Today I got into thinking mode as the bus made it's way towards Emersons Green. I thought about the mysteries of the heart. I cannot understand how it works, it's like it has a mind of it's own.

Tomorrow I've got an appointment with the osteopath. Scary!
I am not working until Tuesday. That is 5 days off. I look forward to some quality time with my duvet!

All Love

Rain, a Flat Tyre and Burger King.

Today has been a day of constant downpour. As I (with no one but myself to blame) had little sleep last night I dragged myself through a 12 hour shift at work. When I finally could get changed and take off it was still raining like mad. I put my waterproofs on and headed out, only to find my bicycle had a flat tyre. There is a reason why I always carry a bike pump in my bag... I had to stop 4 times on my way home to refill my tyres. Third time I stopped by a Burger King and got my rumbling tummy something to digest. As I pumped my tyre up I could see air leaking out making bubbles on the outside of the soaked rubber. And soaked was the right word to describe me when I finally stepped through the door of my flat. The shower felt nice. Really nice!!

Bus tomorrow.

All Love

The End of the Beginning

I am writing tonight because I can and because I'm bored. Usually the work-computers won't allow me to access my blog, but for some reason they decided to be friendly tonight. I'm doing my last night shift for this week, it is quiet and I'm munching sandwiches. Soon I might try and read the book I brought, or try out some artistic creativity. It's all about passing time at the moment, though I am quite pleased to have time for once.

This is the end of the beginning. Today is the anniversary of our move to England. Though Julia is away at the moment, me, Josefin and Maria plan to celebrate it with some nice food and wine this evening. The year's passed quickly, but it has not been a quiet one. Since I moved here I've had so many amazing experiences and I am thankful that God brought me here. What lies ahead, I have no idea. And I don't need to know. What I have found is that it is God, The Big G, who opens doors and closes them. We think we are in control, but with one light blow God can make our whole world come crashing down. With that knowledge I stop striving and hand it all over to God, knowing he will look to my very best. For in myself I can do very little, but with God miracles can happen. And miracles are pretty cool.

Greetings from Emersons Green Treatment Centre

All Love